To Tell the Truth: Giving and Receiving Supportive Feedback
Miriam Bamberger, CPCC, and Heather Bradley, CPCC, are the co-founders of The Flourishing Company, which helps emerging professionals sharpen their leadership skills to generate immediate and lasting changes in their ability to successfully manage complex work relationships. For additional information, visit: www.TheFlourishingCompany.com.
At a sprawling corporate campus, the general counsel prepares for the arrival of her associate general counsel. The general counsel knows she needs to initiate a conversation about the glitches in the most recent transaction the associate general counsel handled. "This is the worst part of the job," she thought.
In a major international law firm, an associate is steeling himself for a meeting. The partner had said they were going to talk about "things." He knew what would happen. The grapevine was ripe with stories of these "annual reviews." The partner would rant and rave about mistakes made months ago or issues out of the associate's control. "If I could change one thing about this firm," he thought, "it would be reviews. How am I supposed to do what they want if no one tells me what is expected?"
It is not always easy to sort out straight goods from a good story when it comes to performance. Unfortunately, many managers and supervisors fail to meet expectations for providing supportive feedback. Crucial to steady improvement and career success, useful feedback is sorely lacking in many law firms and corporate legal departments. In particular, minority attorneys do not always receive the same timely and constructive feedback as their white counterparts. The same thing is equally applicable to many white female attorneys.1 The net effect of a lack of feedback is often recognized when it is too late to reverse: high turnover and recruitment costs, and teams that do not meet clients' needs for diversity and expertise.
Employees expect and need feedback for steady improvement and career success. Dissatisfaction and uncertainty build without meaningful feedback that is given on a regular basis. Complaints also arise when the situation is handled inappropriately, such as when comments are not useful or when feedback constitutes a veiled attack. Supporting your team members means not only giving feedback, but also helping employees understand how to apply it.
Fear Factor
Why do so many supervisors and managers avoid giving feedback? Some people fear facing their own guilt or embarrassment for not having set clear expectations up front. Others, while they might not admit it, fear the employee won't like them if they deliver bad news. Some fear the threat of a lawsuit if they praise an employee and, down the road, the employee's advancement expectations are disappointed. Or, they fear becoming stuck in a circular argument about whether the feedback is accurate in the employee's eyes. Still others fear being labeled "biased" when giving less than positive feedback to a minority or female team member. These are valid fears, but they are not valid reasons for side-stepping this pivotal management function. Your human resources professional can help you develop strategies and tactics for overcoming these concerns.
SUPPORTive Feedback
In this issue of D&B Briefs, we will introduce the SUPPORT Feedback Formula™ to be used in conjunction with the Flourishing Process™. Use the SUPPORT Feedback Formula to test your message and alleviate some of your fears and concerns.
Specific
Cite explicit, concrete examples of observable behavior. "Your work is sloppy," is vague. Is the content wrong or incomplete? Is the grammar poor? Was a deadline missed? Was this a one-time offense or a perpetual problem?
By being specific, you help the receiver understand what was unacceptable and what is expected in the future. For example, "Your last three research assignments were late. As a result, the rest of the team had to do extra work to meet the submission deadline."
Unemotional
Always deliver feedback when you are calm, and avoid words that may convey judgment or personal criticism. There is a fine line between evaluating someone's performance and passing judgment on the person.
"You need to take more initiative" could be interpreted by some as "You're lazy." (And it's vague!) Using examples of specific observable behavior will help neutralize emotion and judgment.
"It would help the team if you were to take the lead occasionally on projects. For example, when we were discussing how the changes in regulations would affect us, did you notice how Jim immediately volunteered to research the changes? We'd like to see you volunteer without being asked."
Periodic
There shouldn't be any surprises at an annual review. It should simply recap what you both already know happened—the great and the not-so-great. Associates or staff members cannot change their behavior if they do not know there is a problem. Periodic, informal feedback allows staff to correct problems—or build on successes—right away, increasing the productivity of your team.
Periodic feedback also reduces the importance of any one interaction, alleviating anxiety for both you and the receiver. At the same time, praising contributions that are on target fosters stronger relationships and positively rewards desired behavior. As a result, you will foster trust, collaboration, and a belief you want to see your team succeed.
Plan based on the feedback
The purpose of feedback is to improve work results and eliminate surprises. It is not a dump-and-run mission.
If you want your staff to change behavior, craft a plan together that includes specific action steps, deadlines, and accountability measures to help the person succeed. If you are delivering feedback as a cover-up mechanism for a personnel decision that has already been made, you are being unfair both to that person and to the organization.
Owned by the person offering the feedback
Have the courage of your convictions. Hiding behind your boss or a policy will discredit you and your message. If you do not agree with the message you have been asked to deliver, address it with the people whose message it is. As noted above, if a decision affecting someone's career path has already been made, be professional enough to say what really needs to be said.
Receiver-focused
As the messenger, it is your responsibility to deliver the feedback in a way that allows the receiver to understand it fully. This approach will take some attention and consideration on your part. Think about the receiver. What kind of expressions does this person use? Colorful, visual, colloquial, formal? Without changing the essence of your message, use the receiver's "language" to help get your point across.2
For most of us, being in the spotlight of receiving feedback—whether positive or negative—is uncomfortable. The receiver's anxiety will heighten the impact of your words. Praise good work and offer empathy for difficult situations to help the receiver be more open and less defensive.
Timely
Deliver feedback as close to the occurrence of the observable behavior as possible. This reaction may be the last thing you want to do, especially if the offending event has caused a major headache for you. (Again, if you are emotional, take time to calm down and collect your thoughts.) The best time to correct behavior is immediately after the event. Feedback will be most effective when the circumstances are fresh and relevant for both you and the recipient.
To ensure your feedback provides SUPPORT for the receiver, use The Flourishing Process to prepare for delivering it. Think about someone on your staff to whom you'd like to give feedback. These comments could be negative or positive. Positive feedback is often considered unnecessary, yet offering it is one of the most significant-and easiest-kinds of positive reinforcement you can offer.
| Receiving Feedback To make the most of your annual review or any informal feedback your boss or colleagues offer, consider the following:
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Clarity
- What specifically do you want to be different after giving the feedback?
- What do you want the person to KNOW? The impact of behavior? New policies?
- What do you want the person to DO? Manage time better? Take on more responsibility?
- How do you want the person to FEEL? Inspired? An appreciation for the gravity of the situation?
Double check to ensure you have addressed all of the factors in the SUPPORT Feedback Formula. Resist the temptation to simply fill in the blanks in your head. Writing down your answers will help you separate fact from opinion and craft more useful feedback.
- Identify what could get in your way of delivering the feedback. Fear? Lack of time? A potentially negative response from the recipient?
Before delivering the feedback, share your thoughts with someone who is impartial, such as a member of HR or the professional administrative staff. Using a sounding board will help you identify potential landmines and overcome any barriers.
Choice
With your thoughts in one place, on the paper in front of you, you have some choices to make.
- What do you want to say?
- When do you want to say it?
- How do you want to say it?
- What are the objective examples I'll reference? Action
- What action steps do you want your staff member to take?
While it is important that you and your reports create a mutually beneficial plan, drafting a few ideas ahead of time will help frame the conversation in a useful, forward-thinking way.
- If the reaction of the recipient is particularly explosive, know that you can schedule a subsequent discussion to begin the action-planning phase. Let the person absorb the feedback and cool down.
Will the Real Supportive Manager Please Stand Up?
Providing useful feedback is not for the faint of heart, yet it is key. Avoiding feedback is a disservice to your employees, your organization, and yourself.
Miriam Bamberger, CPCC, and Heather Bradley, CPCC, are the co-founders of The Flourishing Company, which helps emerging professionals sharpen their leadership skills to generate immediate and lasting changes in their ability to successfully manage complex work relationships. For additional information, visit: www.TheFlourishingCompany.com.
NOTES
- See, Creating Pathways to Diversity®: A Set of Recommended Practices for Law Firms, p. 19.
- See, "This Land was Made for You and Me," Diversity & the Bar®, May/June 2004, p. 54.
From the November/December 2004 issue of Diversity & The Bar®